update

The last post was just the first part of a terrible holiday season. I got the flu which was good bc it slowed life down a bit and forced me to stay in.  I ended a dating streak with firefighter bc he was a dickhead. I had Christmas at Walters house which included me locking myself in the bathroom and crying bc I missed my family. New Years was ok I worked. I went home to Florida for 10 days. Mom got sick. I loved seeing my family and friends. I came back on a lazy note, unable to fully motivate myself to get my life in order again. I'm still feeling like that and to top it off I was laid off from my job. Its been a week since it happened and although I thankfully got a job, I really need to do something else. I'm so sick of hospitality. I'm ready for whats really supposed to happen in my life. I stopped the going out dating madness and decided to calm the fuck down. Its been a weird week. I've nurtured another relationship with a friend I've known and had a crush on for two years now. We've been seeing each other for a few weeks and he definitely knocks my socks off. Its been a while since I've felt butterflies. Unfortunately, he's fresh out of a relationship so I figured its best to take it slow and let him drive. its painful. long and torturous. I'm definitely used to being the agressor. but it makes it more exciting to see him. :)