QUOTE

"The day you stop learning is the day you die".

Yup. That pretty much sums it all up for me. I don't think I'll ever be stagnant when it comes to knowledge. It reminds me of my late grandfather. I have memories of him at 83, in his dusty office reading books like 'Computers for dummies' or 'Windows for dummies'. He was always in the know about everything and wanting to learn.
Now, I will say I'm not super intrigued by technology but more about specific things in life, like music, fashion, etc..... and I'll always want to know more and continue applying it to whatever job it is I have at the moment. I'll take an opportunity and run with hopes that eventually one of them will turn into the fabulous career and life I imagine myself having.
I may not be rich in wealth, but I strive to be a millionaire with knowledge.

Hokey Pokey

Call me crazy but I'm kind of looking forward to returning to New York without a job.
Solely for the fact that- Ill have so much time on my hands and be able to dedicate it to my craft. ...
And do what I love..
Because that's what it all about!

CHICAGO OR TEXAS?

Its funny how things work around here.
I lost my job, I've reached out to people, I landed an interview then I get a call from my entertainment manager for an audition for Chicago the Musical for Royal Caribbean Cruiselines. The audition of course is the morning I fly back to New York. There's no way I could make it.
So what do I do? I haven't danced in forever. I haven't practiced voice in a while and I would have to completely change my flight in order to make it. Most people would say 'No are you crazy?' But Chicago is the basis of my dream of performing.
I always wanted to be Velma Kelly.
Therein lies the problem. I guess the question is: How bad do I want it and will I be able to prepare enough to make the casting directors to notice me? And whats the cost of changing my flight?
If I got the job it'd be a great opportunity. But it also means that the life I'm creating now with Adam would be put on hold at least for another year.
I honestly think I'm not in performing shape to go out there. If I were in NY, I would absolutely go, take some jazz classes, maybe have a voice session to prepare. But the fact is, I'll still be here.

Which leads me to another thought. Is it a sign?  Is the fact that I'm not turning my world upside down to get to a coveted audition a sign that the industry is not as important to me? Or does it mean I just prefer the less stress way of life? It kind of reminds me of something I noticed last year- EVERYTIME I TRAVEL I get an awesome audition or cast in a commercial I cannot attend.
I guess I'll add this one to the list-(of signs?)

SLCP. PLSC.CLSP. LOL

Its been a while since I last posted a blog and I apologize.
I can't even tell you how busy I've been. I enrolled in a few classes at FIT along with the freelance work at the magazine along with the balancing a long distance relationship with trips every month.

At the beginning of the summer I had a plan with my life motto 'Keep it Simple stupid'- where I would freelance, study music and stay healthy and active. I decided my perfect life would be to freelance by day and perform at night. I was truly successful and felt like I was thriving as a human being. Now I find myself stressed bc of the classes, work and emotionally stressed with constant adjustment of the heart/mind aspect of my relationship. It gets draining and the worst part is realizing I need a job that keeps me challenged, happy and constantly engaged- that which my current job does none of. Above all else, I MISS PERFORMING. I truly truly truly miss it. Even if it's simply doing so in class, that alones helps me feel like I'm growing and improving.  I don't remember the last time I did a proper warm-up.

I've since found myself so unhappy to the point where I prayed for a break.
Lo and behold- Sandy the Hurricane hit New York while I'm in Dallas visiting Adam. She has kept me here stationed up without a laptop, any books for class and access to design programs. I got what I asked for :) a break from missing my boyfriend, a break from working on bodybuilders and sewing/designing. Being stripped of all tasks and to-do's helps me realize what is important to me.
Safety, love, creativity and expression and progress.
If I had my sewing machine here, I'd be using it. Adam's cats and neighbors have probably never heard anyone sing so loud in his apartment. An Adam, wonderful Adam has kept me so safe. My rock.

A week or two ago I read a Q&A in an article that was really inspiring. The girl asked the guru something along the lines of: I'm 26 years old and my parents are cutting me off. There are no jobs, NYC is expensive. I have no money. what to do? etc...
Guru responded with: you don't need your parents to succeed. (or anyone else for that matter) You can CREATE your perfect job. get a free website. download a credit card machine for your smart phone. ... and went down a list of things to do to create your perfect job/life and not depend on anyone to do so.

My goal on this break is to create just that.
My perfect life still involves creative during the day but I realize just any creative won't cut it.

Safety, Love, Creativity and Progress....

Sounds like a new tattoo ;)

Love of fashion

Wow I can't believe it's been over a month since my last blog. So much has happened but I feel its only fair I attack one subject at a time. :)
It truly has been a summer of loves and my classes have really catered to love.

Tonight I was overlooking the curriculum for the FIT Fashion Design One Year AA program. About a week ago, I decided to take my life into my own hands and stop fantasizing over fashion classes. I finally signed up for two, a sewing techniques class and a Fashion art and design.
I've had the FIT course description catalogue for over 2 years. I've been wanting to explore that side of my passions for some time. It was something I'd literally stare at every morning and flip through the pages imaging how awesome it'd be to take this class and that class.
If you haven't figured by now, I have a lot of interests in life. But my love of art/performance and fashion are none other.
I had actually been accepted into the Fashion Merchandise and Marketing program for Fall but backed out after much discussion with industry professionals that I would thrive as a designer rather than accounts/business person. I figured pushing the degree back a year is worth taking a few classes rather than throwing myself into debt and another degree that I don't absolutely love.
and I really love this one. I've only had two of each class and I'm already starting to feel so good about them. It's not like my undergrad where I was just breezing through blindly, not fully grasping assignments and doing the work last minute. I really understand the content and I'm actually feeling I can excel quickly. I practice sewing on the machine so I can walk into class and get A's on my assignment. I check and double check and triple check that I understand the instructions so I can have the perfect seams on my assignment.
Its crazy. But feels right.
and I'm not afraid.
in fact, I'm so excited.
:)

New York University

A second ago I realized that next January I will have been in NY for 4 years.
4 Years.
4 YEARS!
Thats the duration of an entire university education (if you don't take 5 years like I did :) haha)
NY has been an education. I've learned more in these (almost) 4 years than I did in school. Its the school of hard knocks.
You learn to roll with the punches. Nothing surprises you. You learn to be prepared for anything that can go wrong. Lots of tough guys, lots of rejection.
But all of that makes the reward so much sweeter when you succeed.

Go Big or go Home.

I am home.

:)

Scat a tat tat

I  signed up for a Jazz workshop class at the New York Jazz academy recently. In two hours I not only refreshed a load of music theory I hadn't addressed in YEARS, but I was also challenged to perform a new song (one we just learned in class) on a mic, n front of the class, and, for the first time, scat. 

The teacher was super nice and told me that she'd alternate phrasing with me the third time around. At the end she told me 'awesome!' 

Yay. sigh.  

And since then I've approached songs I listen to regularly with the 'be-dah-be-dah-be-dah' exercise and its amazing how my head just gets lost in all the other instruments and I have no idea what will come out of my voice. Maybe its my ADD. LOL

Regardless, I'm so glad ONE class opened up this hypothetical door. 

The sky's the limit from here boys! :)

My favorite Scat-a-licious diva herself

Miss Ella

I'M GOING TO SLAP YOU!

I had a pretty amazing voice lesson the other day.
I arrived in New York Broadway bound. Ironically, the influencing question was 'Go to New York for Broadway or go to New Orleans for Jazz?' My thoughts at the time were, I'm only young and active now, let me see how Broadway works.
Jazz found me in New York instead...
From being employed at a Jazz club and now working on standards and building my repertoire, its just funny how the universe puts you in your place.
So at the lesson, my coach asked me 'what kind of sound do you want?' It was interesting because I was just talking to my roommate regarding the music in my book and how a lot of the songs we've gone over I don't find inspiring or at least entertaining. I've always sung what he wants me to and I decided I need to tell him what I want. Then he challenged me and said 'do you even know?' The thing is, I have a different voice. I'm not a Billy or a Nina or an Aretha but I have some soul. I can sound pretty and have a longevity with my notes. I can also sound like a teenager (i.e., Bye bye Birdie) So with a question like that, you can't say, I want to sound like Amy Winehouse because, well,  every voice has its distinct quality. I know what I like to hear, but I'm not trying to copy anyone's specific sound.
Anyhow so he asked me what instruments I like the most and I said trumpet, piano and violins. (funny I've dated two of those)
So he said 'Pretend you're a trumpet and sing this song'. Now I obviously wasn't singing  'wah whahaha', I sang it how I would sing it as myself.
When we finished he said 'thats the best I've ever heard you sing'.
I said,' Because I was having fun and singing it myself'.
He says, ' I'm going to slap you in the face'.

LOL. He's a trip.

I explained to him that I sing how he wants me to sing. Sing soft, I sing soft. Sing uberloud, I sing uberloud. And finally he tells me to be myself and its the best. I really think we found the right place.
He drilled technique into my voice and as long as I can keep practicing and keep my sound consistent, I free to learn songs on my own, which essentially is what I need to do on my own anyhow.

:)

On another positive note, I've been networking like a crazy! I have collected so many business cards from various fellow vocalists or writers. Its been pretty amazing. I feel so blessed to have had such opportunities that are allowing me to do this...

OH Wow Anne

Only in NY

You know growing up as a kid, my parents were divorced, mom became a working mother and somehow managed to keep us kids occupied on very little child support. Dance classes, volleyball practice,etc.. Most of our non-divorced friends were leading lives of international vacations and karate classes. While we as kids, never wanted to miss out, I can tell it pained her just not having enough money to send all of us.
I always wanted to go to see the touring Broadway shows. Those were my happiest memories. Dad took me and my siblings to see 42nd street and I fell in love. I had playmates that would fly to NY and watch shows, and though I was so excited for them, deep down I wish I could do it too. Chicago on Broadway for a Dance convention. We were always taught never to ask for too much. But in retrospect, I have two memories of asking for something and getting it, one being the Fraggle Rock book collections was only two easy payments of $9.99 with a matching tote, the other, tickets to see 42nd street. Ask and you shall receive? Yes! and no, not in my family. To dream big  and push boundaries wasn't exactly something our family did. I don't know how many times I heard my mother say 'who do you think you are?' My response should have been 'still figuring that out mom'...  Anyway, thats another post...

Now I live in NY. Maybe that was the biggest draw, other than obvious career move. Its amazing to have the best theatre at your fingertips.
I had the privilege of watching 'Death of a Salesman' starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Andrew Garfield, Linda Emond.
I normally like going into a show not knowing the story and being completely floored by whats presented. This time I read the play first. I kind of wish I didn't. Funny thing is, I would read before bed and I think I was half asleep through some of them because I completely forgot a few scenes. Also, as an actor, you watch a show differently than the average person. Since I already knew the story, I got lost in the actors and choices each made rather than sit back and be entertained. Regardless, the performance took over and by the end I was crying, bawling, huffy and puffy hysterical. When that curtain goes down, I always get so overwhelmed with emotion.  That something can be so powerful and move audiences...
It reminds me of why I want to do this.
And why I want to be here.

I'm so grateful.

The Ovation

When the crowd roars in approval, That's when I cry the hardest. Because of sheer happiness for the actors who have succeeded amongst every odd at living their dream. because I'm so very proud of them. Because, its not easy. And because I only wish to do the same.

Lack of life or lack of love at risk? Or both?

I was given an opportunity! But without noticing, the boundless opportunity was transformed into something constricting and dangerous. The opportunity had become risk...
All growth is precede by risk-taking. There is no innovation, no great work of art or love story that has not involved a number of risks. Why don't we throw ourselves into all risks with great joy? Is it the fear of hurting ourselves or the risk to our own or others lives? Yes, but the majority of the factors that hold us back are based on fear of quite harmless things. No one has ever died from saying 'I love you', even though it may feel like it at the moment.
-Tilde Bjorfors

Never have I ever....

Spent the night in Times Square to get tickets to a show.
...on a school night...(thankfully the boss let me come in late)...
...had bums make fun of the group for sleeping on the streets....
...not showered in the morning in the last ten years and gone in public...
...spent a chunk of money on a broadway show...
...had such an awkward major crush on Andrew Garfield....
...been woken up by my friend Daniel....
....spent a chunk of money on tickets to a Broadway show... (I'm still wrapping my head around this one)
.... been so dedicated to such an event...
     (dedicated or just unwilling to take 'no' for an answer?


It was Phillip Seymour Hoffman in Death of A Salesman... Can you blame me?

Major 'What I do for love' points right there....

CABARET! CABARET! CABARET!

I've been itching to do a cabaret with my roommate Chris. I have a couple of great ideas for us to work on. I don't want to say much other than, if you are or know a pianist that will be willing to work on a medley with us, let me know... I've run the idea past a few fellow performers and they love it :)
Time to get to work!

Mi Papi no es mi Papi

I did a play reading this weekend for UBER talented writer Corina Rios. I was to read the stage directions and the role of Beatiz, the protagonists friend in a few scenes... and wouldn't you know one of the leads didn't show up and I was fortunate enough to read her part! Weird how things like that happen and you're given a chance to shine. It felt good. Its been quite some time since I've performed a role live. Meeting all those actors made me itch for the stage again. I think I might audition to join a group or something...
We shall see...

Dear Lord

I sit here in this random hotel room and think of all the blessings and talent you have given me but I'm not always sure what you want me to do with them. I can exercise a few at a time but not all simultaneously.... with hopes that this is the purpose you want from my existence.
Everything happens for a reason.
There are so many things I can have faith in.
Be my date at the premiere tomorrow

Xo
Frances

Ps I ate a French fry and it was so not worth it. I'm shitty at the lent sacrifice but I have more to time to improve!

Role Models

You know it's funny
When I was in college I bought a few books that had nothing to do with my curriculum.
I was fascinated by Cleopatra. Her personality, her power, how she ruled her empire. And though I didn't particularly like JLo as an artist, I always respected her as a business woman who could build her empire, as the face of her empire. I saw a commercial for Amex once. It was Diane Von Furstenburg talking about her life and how when she was young (my age) she didn't know what she wanted to do, but she knew who she wanted to be. Though I'm nowhere near the caliber of these women I know they all had the same feeling I have. To make big change. To make a big difference.
The one thing I have in common with these women is that we started small.
I know the kind of woman I want to be.
I'm still small but one day I'll have my empire, just as these marvelous women do.

NEW TOY!!

Do you ever get that feeling about discovering something new that feels right and just makes freaking sense?
Thanks to my manager, I realized how valuable I am as a Spanish speaking actress.
He's sent me on many VO auditions and I realize, I LOVE doing voiceovers. Not only that, I'm realizing I have a voice, and a good one.
I can read really well and add character to such readings.
More so, when I think back, I loved reading aloud in class. I was proud I could read well and quickly. Funny thing is I still read quickly and I have to remind myself not to do so in an audition.
Anyhow, this is a lucrative part in the Entertainment industry. It pays really well and frankly you can 100% support yourself auditioning from home.
SO
Aside from acting, I've been wanting to record myself singing jazzy tunes and really exploring that side of my voice.
I used to have a boyfriend who was a musician and I always wanted to sing with him but he got into film so kind of left the picture. Lo an behold, another example of you have to do things yourself if you want them done :)  Ok not 100% but still.

Fast forward to now, I have a new toy that will help me kill both birds with one stone.
I just started playing with the sound and getting used to it and I LOVE IT!!!!!!!
BAH!  I had to right a blog post about it.

Here's the beauty.
Can't wait to take an awesome jazzy looking picture with it further down the line.

Wish me luck!

Natural vs Unnatural acting

So I had a conversation with one of my Directors last night about my acting and how it was a little more difficult to edit bc every not every take of mine was the same and that, say with Michael, my co-star, his takes we're precisely choreographed and it was easier to edit. I told him every actor has his different method and I'm more of a natural actor. It's one thing if I'm given choreography for a scene (this entire scene was sitting at the dinner table) but if one take I'm caught up emotionally and I don't pick up the martini glass, I'm not going to stop the take bc of it. Maybe consistency within a take is something I need to work on but then why have the same take over and over? It doesn't allow options for edits right?

I've always been a fast reader...

I just stepped out of the biggest audition yet- McDonalds.
They switched the script on us and I had to memorize a new script in Spanish. Not a problem but of course it's a little nerve wrecking and thankfully there was a prompter there but I read too fast for the prompter and found myself waiting a few seconds between sections. Annoying.
But I gave it a lot of energy and personality which is what they were looking for. Keep me in your prayers!
Xo