emotional statistics

It'd be wrong of me to neglect a certain aspect of my life in this blog.
Eventually, when I'm old and this website isn't advanced for the technology of the ages, I'd like to print all my blogs ever written in this portion of my life and maybe, if interesting enough, make a book.

So.

On that note.
I've been on a sort of weird affection revolution. No I'm not gay. Though, I have kissed one a Laticia Costa look-alike in Paris. If you saw her, you would have too. :)
And no, my house is not Chateau Frances.
I think I really just let go of being a tight-ass and unattainable.
If anyone knows me, my last relationship was quite a bit lacking in that department. And the relationship before that was nuts.
It's never been balanced. I almost feel like I've making up for what I felt I should have had.
Maybe it's filling a void. Maybe it's feeling lonely, needing affection, desire. Maybe it's stress, a reaction to the immense amount of pressure I've recently put on myself to succeed and just desiring a the comfort of a warm human body. or a smile. They're common. They're human.
or maybe i'm just living every day to its fullest.
maybe its creating a life full of amazing fun stories. maybe its hoping that the more I put myself out there, the possibility of finding someone to settle down with is greater.
and suddenly it's all statistics.